Blue Dress Socks

There comes a time in every man's life when he knows he is getting old. For some it comes in the form of gray hair showing up around the temples. For others, it might be a bald spot making its presence known. For others, it's when children hit significant milestones in life. I checked all three of those off my list a long time ago and still didn't feel that old, until last week. This was the week when I realized that I really am getting old.

The weather has been nice and the days are getting longer. Along with that, the yard maintenance hiatus I enjoyed during the winter has ended and spring is in full bloom. That means the lawn needs regular mowing and hedges need their semi-annual trim. One day last week I came home from work ready to tackle some of these pressing issues.

One of life's greatest joys is coming home at the end of the day and climbing out of the stuffy attire required in the workplace and into a comfortable pair of jeans. On this particular day, I picked a well-worn pair that would allow me to work freely in the yard without fear that my wife would scold me for ruining another pair of new jeans. It was as I was changing that I realized I was indeed old. One sign of old age that I haven't yet mentioned is that you start to care more about function and ease than about fashion.  That's why you see elastic waistbands and velcro shoes in vogue at IHOP between four and five every afternoon.

With the jeans in place and a t-shirt on, I glanced down at the dark blue dress socks that still remained from my previous attire and thought to myself, "Who cares?" No one was going to see my socks while I was trimming hedges so why bother changing them? Wearing blue dress socks with jeans and running shoes doesn't make you old. Not being embarrassed about it does. I must be old.

So, thirty-seven years into my life I can proudly and publicly say that I am not ashamed of my blue dress socks! Are you confident enough in your own manhood to join me in this? Will you stand up to all the trendy soccer moms and travel-ball dads and tell them that after five o'clock, fashion doesn't matter. It's my home and my yard, and, doggone it, they're my feet and I'll do with them as I darn well please. Long live the blue dress sock!